Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Cellphone Can Facilitate Teen Dating Abuse

The Christian Science Monitor has an article about dating violence which gets into some important issues and which highlights a new resource.

For teens, cellphones are an essential tool for everything from social networking to video games. For parents, knowing their child has a cellphone provides a sense of security. But for a substantial number of teens who are dating, communications on cellphones and computers are taking a turn toward obsession and abuse.

It's a side of kids' social lives that many parents aren't aware of, according to a study released last week by Liz Claiborne Inc. In partnership with the National Domestic Violence Hotline, the company has also just launched loveisrespect.org, the first national website and 24-hour help line that specifically addresses teen dating abuse.

I can see how a cellphone can be used like a leash. The problem with leashes is that they destroy the relationship they are used to keep in line. A relationship needs to be just that to be healthy. A true relationship, not ownership.

If someone feels they own someone else they need to back off and figure out why they are so insecure. The overwhelming need to control someone else is evidence of an internal vacuum that no other person can fill. As small children we rely on adults to provide us with the sense of being loved, but as children reach their teens they need to learn an independant sense of being loved and being loveable.

They also need to understand that not all love is or should be unconditional. Healthy love has boundaries which diminish neither the person who loves or the person who is loved.

It isn't real love if you ever bully or coerce the person you claim to love to get them to be or do what you want.
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posted by Marcella Chester @ 7:34 AM   1 comments links to this post

1 Comments:

At February 14, 2007 12:13 PM, Blogger Holly said...

Great post Marcella,
I truly feel this part of the post is true,

"They also need to understand that not all love is or should be unconditional. Healthy love has boundaries which diminish neither the person who loves or the person who is loved."

We have not been teaching our youth about unconditional love.

Sincerely Holly Desimone

 

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