Saturday, July 28, 2007

The Power of Rightfully Claiming Victimhood

So many people too quickly say, "Don't be a victim" because they don't want to deal with the issues that arise if the person they are saying this to is acknowledged as a real crime victim.

One of the issues I dealt with for years when I didn't accept being a real victim was a sense that I was crazy. Accepting the full truth about what happened to me, including actions I wish I hadn't taken, put some of the missing pieces of the puzzle where I could see them. What had seemed like a hopelessly jumbled mess began to make sense.

My irrationality was quite rational. I had just buried many of the puzzle pieces. Once I had those first missing pieces within reach I could more easily find other missing pieces or make sense of the ones I'd always been able to see.

Denying my victimhood was denying an important truth and it [accepting that truth] has made me stronger rather than weaker. Before people's harsh words could easily hurt me. Now I recognize people who are in denial or who perpetuate dangerous beliefs that demand denial even if I don't know their reasons.

Most importantly, rightfully claiming victimhood has allowed me to break this secret which protects the wrongdoing of others. Breaking this secret might also help others break their secrets even if it is only safe for them to reveal the truth to themselves.

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posted by Marcella Chester @ 7:00 PM   0 comments links to this post


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