Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Dr. Laura Blames Gov. Spitzer's Wife For Prostitution Ring Scandal

I was watching the Today Show and I just lost my appetite thanks to Dr. Laura Schlessinger's comments as part of a panel on why men cheat which used Gov. Eliot Spitzer's prostitution ring scandal as an example.

Dr. Laura's tired old wife blaming which says that substandard wifely behavior makes husbands susceptible to being lured away is typical BS (which cheating men love to hear). For anyone who isn't hopelessly in love with blaming the wife for the husband's behavior they will be able to see that this case disproves Dr. Laura's wife blaming theory.

Further, if Dr. Laura doesn't blame husbands just as much for wives who cheat then she clearly doesn't believe in the principles which are the rockbed of her wife blaming theory.

In this case, like many others the cheating husband wasn't lured away by anybody. It wasn't a prostitute who lured Gov. Spitzer, but Gov. Spitzer who made arrangements to have a prostitute delivered much like imported caviar.

That behavior reflects on general attitudes about sex and about prostitution. For many men hiring a prostitute isn't "real" cheating since it isn't an emotional betrayal of their wife or girlfriend. They are just having the chassis lubed.

Other men, like clients 1 through 8, whoever they are may have directly affected Gov. Spitzer's decision to use this prostitution agency by their attitudes and behavior related to using the most expensive prostitution agencies. Because of the prices and the packaging, this prostitution ring could feel like it has nothing in common with "bad" prostitution rings which put girls out on street corners or shut them inside massage parlors.

Yet men's attitudes and actions related to cheating and prostitution are never to blame and they are rarely mentioned when these topics are discussed in the mainstream news.

This attitude of Dr. Laura's which gives men an easy excuse for cheating isn't far removed from the attitudes which blame rape victims for their rapist's behavior.

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posted by Marcella Chester @ 9:17 AM   6 comments links to this post

6 Comments:

At March 11, 2008 10:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for your comments. I could hardly believe what I was hearing from a so-called "expert in her field" No wonder battered wives feel they have to stay with their abusive husbands. "Dr" Laura makes it sound as if women are nothing more than props and prop-ups for thier men...

 
At March 11, 2008 1:48 PM, Blogger Me- Maintaining confidentiality said...

I whole-heartedly agree. I work in the mental health system and I teach personal responsibility to each of my clients. I encourage them to accept the blame for their own actions, as well as the consequences. If they don't, I confront them. Dr. Laura is not a psychologist (she has her doctorate in physiology), but she gives psychologists a bad name. She continues to blame the victim and is attempting to set women's rights back several decades.

 
At March 11, 2008 1:50 PM, Blogger Me- Maintaining confidentiality said...

I whole-heartedly agree. I work in the mental health system and I teach personal responsibility to each of my clients. I encourage them to accept the blame for their own actions, as well as the consequences. If they don't, I confront them. Dr. Laura is not a psychologist (she has her doctorate in physiology), but she gives psychologists a bad name. She continues to blame the victim and is attempting to set women's rights back several decades.

 
At March 11, 2008 4:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

On the other hand, Dr. Gail Saltz, female psychiatrist, consultant for MSNBC, once received a request for advice from a man whose wife had cheated on him. Most of her reply to the man consisted of, what did you do to cause your wife to cheat on you.

My first marriage ended because of the infidelity of my now ex wife. She abandoned me to live with her lover. When her relationship with her lover broke down, she wanted to reconcile. When she wanted to reconcile, her spin on our split was, she did not abandon me - my insensitivity to her problems drove her away and I was taking advantage of the situation to divorce her. One of her friends told me I was a hypocrite to be hurt and upset over her infidelity. I had never cheated on her so why was I the hypocrite? According to my ex's girlfriend, I would have cheated on my ex if I had had the chance.

 
At March 11, 2008 5:22 PM, Blogger JENNIFER DREW said...

There are no excuses for Spitzer he bought a woman's body in order to gratify his so-called sexual desires. Buying another human being is slavery and in this instance sexual exploitation.

Claiming it is the wife's fault is always designed to excuse the perpetrator's actions and the fact Spitzer chose to buy this woman. If a woman or man cheats on their partner and engages in an affair that is completely different from buying a human being for the purposes of sexual abuse.

But many men apparently believe it is their right to buy prostituted women because these women are not human beings.

Just as male rapists believe it is their right to rape and sexually abuse women and yes most rapists deny their actions and always, always blame women. For too long men have not been held accountable for their actions and instead we hear the old tired claims 'it was the woman's fault.'

 
At March 13, 2008 6:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I watched Mr. Spitzer. Pardon me for being judgmental but I really did not detect any sign of remorse. If anything, he might be sorry for getting caught and losing his comfortable, powerful position.

Saying Mrs. Spitzer is someway responsible for the situation is like saying the spouse of an alcoholic is responsible for the alcoholic's drinking.

 

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