Wednesday, December 16, 2009

From An Alleged Rapist's Mouth

As happens frequently men comment anonymously on my blog and reveal more than they intended.

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Busting The Regret Not Rape Myth":
It's really a damn shame that you sit on your high psudo intelectual throne and call false rape and the regret element a myth!

Shame on you for being so simple and typical of feminist male hate. I am the author of the book [redacted title]. A college girl sucked my dick under the influence of alcohol and intoxicated by the idea of being with an athlete. She only regreted it after she was insulted for being so easy and slutty. Harsh words to call a college girl- no wonder she said it was rape 7 months later.

But don't listen to me- Mrs. "women don't lie about rape"... Listen to the lying bitch who put the hofstra university young men in jail for "gang rape"! You know as I, that If the Horney slut who had drunken sex totally legal, wasn't on the fucking cell phone video- she would be praised as a strong feminist survivor... And those poor innocent young men would rot in prison forever!

Get off your high horse and wake up.
This man's description is typical of those who have defended real sex crimes as nothing more than the victim's regret. Notice that this alleged liar isn't described as making the decision to give him what he wanted of her own free will. That's a red flag to me. His provided motive for this college woman is an allegation as is his claim that he was falsely accused.

Men who commit sex crimes almost always lie about it, but that is a fact this anonymous doesn't care to discuss. Who knows how many sex criminals are praised by people like anonymous as a strong survivor of a false accusation but he likely doesn't worry about poor innocent women forever labeled as false accusers when he and others who share his beliefs believe rapists.

Women are not to be believed according to this anonymous, but anonymous men who claim to have been falsely accused must be believed instantly or those who refuse to do so allegedly hate all men.

The delay in reporting which anonymous references is meaningless as proof of his innocence or as proof that what this woman felt was nothing more than regret of a truly consensual interaction. Most victims of sex crimes don't report immediately. Even if he genuinely viewed the alleged sex crime as no sex crime doesn't mean his perception is correct. Many rapists believe that as long as they don't use a knife or a gun and don't make overt threats that they are doing nothing illegal. They may even know that alcohol is needed to get the other person to take an action but view that needed leverage as meaningless.

When he references the Hofstra case he ignores the issue that this woman was not convicted and the fact that admissions of guilt can coerced by the police from innocent people. The contents of that cell phone video have been described so vaguely as to be meaningless and like videos which allegedly prove a man guilty of rape who has not been convicted, it is evidence at this point, not undeniable proof of anyone's guilt.

He also makes a provably false claim when he writes: "And those poor innocent young men would rot in prison forever!" This false claim ignores that according to RAINN if there is a prosecution there is only a 58% chance of a conviction and if there is a felony conviction there is only a 69% chance the convict will spend time in jail.

But the false narrative that men who are accused will easily be convicted and are likely to spend the rest of their lives in prison fits neatly with the overall "man as victim" narrative that anonymous is promoting.

It's important to note that I didn't say that there have been no fraudulent reports of rape. What I wrote about in the original post is a popular myth which was used to dismiss overt coercion of a girl who did not freely consent and who stopped struggling when that effort seemed futile.


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posted by Marcella Chester @ 12:13 AM   7 comments links to this post


At December 16, 2009 8:07 PM, Blogger Georgia Girl said...

Marcella, Anon sounds like one of the convicted rapists who post on the False Rape Society blog.

Here's an incident that happened over 7 years ago, but it's worth reading ... and typical of why women delay reporting rape:

At December 17, 2009 5:27 PM, Blogger Julian Real said...

What the man describes is rape. His own language, as it is, describes rape. I have encountered men who will admit to having sex with drunk women, with showing up at places where they know women will be drunk enough to not make the wisest decisions, such as when the supposedly nice guy offers her a lift home.

That man's post should be linked to a name and used as evidence that he is a rapist.

A man who was found guilty of sexually assaulting a three year old girl was just sentenced to one year in jail. ONE. Gee, poor dear. Do you think he'll live through that trauma? Never mind about her, after all. She's not a big grown man with something people recognise as a worthwhile life.

At December 18, 2009 12:38 AM, Anonymous m Andrea said...

The red flag to me was that according to this man, two people had sex but only one of them was "easy and slutty". It takes a skewed perception of reality to make that irrational assumption, not to mention his hypocrisy. If she's a "slut" then how come he's not?

Don't have to read any further than that to figure he's the one with a problem.

Anyway, someone at Echidne's made the point that a man is more likely to be raped himself, than to be falsely accused of rape. And that being the case, there is no reason for most men to be more concerned about the "falsely accused".

And if their concern for justice is truly their only motivation, then a reasonable person would expect men to be more upset by the number of rapists who go unpunished -- because the number of actual rapists is much, much greater than the number of false accusers.

At December 18, 2009 1:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's important to note that I didn't say that there have been no fraudulent reports of rape.

But I bet that most of those there are don't come down to "regret." If I regret something I've done, then my response to try to minimise how much influence that action will have on my life thereafter - that might involve making amends if I've wronged someone, undoing it if at all feasible, or just never talking about it again - but I don't try to make a big noise about that will reach people who don't already know.

For a woman to accuse a man of rape, that's something almost guaranteed to take over her life as people flock round to tell about all the ways she's a slut and it's her fault (even many of those who believe her and claim to be on her side will tell her so). Even if we were to take the MRA-beloved model of the conniving woman as truth, it doesn't seem like an effective way of making up for sex that she regrets.

And then there's what Anonymous says here:

She only regreted it after she was insulted for being so easy and slutty.

Who insulted her I wonder?

Maybe we could give men like this the equivalent of the usual level of rape-prevention advice, and encourage them to be better in the sack, so that women don't regret it. How would that go over in MRA-land?

At December 24, 2009 8:17 AM, Anonymous BASTA! said...

Maybe we could give men like this the equivalent of the usual level of rape-prevention advice, and encourage them to be better in the sack, so that women don't regret it. How would that go over in MRA-land?

That's very much the advice I've been giving to myself and following, and not having sex in 5 years as a result.

At December 24, 2009 11:06 AM, Blogger Julian Real said...

@Maybe we could give men like this the equivalent of the usual level of rape-prevention advice, and encourage them to be better in the sack, so that women don't regret it.

Maybe we could teach boys to not approach girls for sex. Maybe we could teach men to not approach women for sex. Maybe, just maybe, if men like the poster of the comment this blogpost is about, who don't respect women, who would even support such an action taking place, utterly self-servingly to be sure, those men shouldn't go near women at all, ESPECIALLY inebriated women.

Why can't men be at least THAT responsible? And maybe men could give up looking at raped women in pornography, so as to stop reinforcing their "right" (wrong) to have access (visual or otherwise) to incested, pimped, and/or raped women.

Maybe there should be a website with the photos of all the men who engage in such grossly self-serving sex with women that women may or may not name as rape. And those het men who doubt the women who do name it as rape, well, then you can just stay away from her too. How is it that men's sex-lives have become so damned dependent on using people as things? How dehumanised is that?

Imagine actually caring enough about those human beings you have sexual contact with to know not to be selfish to begin with. And to think "Oh, she's intoxicated. That's a sign I SHOULDN'T approach her for sex and shouldn't welcome sex from her!" (I know heterosexual men who behave this way, so it is possible.)

Imagine that!

At December 29, 2009 12:02 PM, Anonymous DvaBeyondSilence said...

Just as a stupid aside: "high psudo intelectual" -- from the foundation up this one is wanting:

psudo (sic) is properly spelled with an "e" as in: pseudo, and

intelectual (sic) is properly spelled with an additional "l" as in: intellectual.

I'm all ears now to hear his intellectually stimulating assessment of the situation at hand.:/


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